This book is such a great tool for anyone dealing with those moments where you come apart at the hinges: whether with your huband, children, family, friends, co-workers or the countless people you meet in your day. Lysa gives an honest glimpse into her own life which I'm sure anyone can relate to. She also gives practical advice to deal with those days whether your exploder or stuffer of a bit of them all. The dvd study that goes along with it is also a a gem!
As only Lysa can, she writes in a humorous, genuine style to show you her flaws and her triumphs at being all that God has planned for her to be. Her latest book, Unglued: Making Wise Choices In the Midst of Raw Emotions, provides a few real world anecdotes of times where she's lost it and how she's learned to find a more Godly response to those situations. Lysa talks about the four different kinds of unglued reactions:
1. The Exploder Who Shames Herself - These are times when you lose your cool and then feel horrible about your reaction
2. The Exploder Who Blames Others - These are the times when, somehow, it becomes everyone else's fault that you have reacted the way you did_.because they led you to that behavior.
3. The Stuffer Who Builds Barriers - These are times when someone has really hurt you but you keep silent about it and, in turn, react to them differently causing deeper damage to the relationship.
4. The Stuffer Who Collects Retaliation Rocks - These are times when you keep silent when someone has hurt you and you keep stuffing it down_until it explodes into a whole litany of rational and irrational things against the other person(for everything they've done in the last 10 years).
By being open and honest about a variety of her own reactions, Lysa speaks to the reader as if she is a good friend confiding with you about the daily struggles of marriage, raising kids and working. But, Lysa gives us practical tips along the way on how she has learned to improve her behavior and "make wise choices in the midst of raw emotions". There are some great pearls of wisdom in this book that we can all use!
I hate to start this post with an apology, but I'm sorry it's so heavy on quotes. I feel like this review calls for it!
This description of the book, from the BookSneeze website, is what hooked me: "Raw emotions are those feelings we hide from others but take out on those we love most. We may exhibit patience and kindness when talking with the grocery clerk, a co-worker, even the difficult person at the returns counter; but, at home, sometimes the smallest, most trivial things set women off, sparking an angry word, cruel comment behind someone's back, or a flood of tears." This is the book I was hoping Runaway Emotions would be. And I need it.
TerKeurst advises readers to be ready before the unexpected happens that would make us flip our lids. (Makes sense.) This list is what you and I need to have memorized:
"Alarmed, I resolve to remember who I am." (TerKeurst says she tells her children this as they leave the house. That is, remember that they are members of that family and also are Christians.)
"Jesus, Jesus, Jesus." (TerKeurst relates an incident that occurred at a conference where she was speaking. She came to the scene after a woman had just been informed her two granddaughters had been killed in a fire. TerKeurst noticed this woman calmed whenever someone said "Jesus" as they were praying over her. TerKeurst says, "As we continued to repeat the name of Jesus, we felt an outpouring of power beyond what we were capable of mustering up on our own.... When I am in an unglued place, I can invite a power beyond my own into the situation by simply speaking His name. I don't have to know what to do. I don't have to have all the answers. I don't have to remember everything I learned in Bible study last week. I just have to remember one thing, one name - Jesus.")
"Stay in the flow - my job is obedience; God's job is results."
"Shift from an attitude to gratitude."
"My reactions determine my reach." TerKeurst says, "The interactions I have with my kids, my husband, my friends, my neighbors, my church, even the checkout clerk at my local grocery store - they matter.... When my happy gets bumped, what's really going on in my heart is on display. In those times I will either add to the authenticity of my love for Jesus or, sadly, negate it."
Hopefully having reviewed this book will help me remember these steps, though my favorite is #2.
I can't say it was having read the book that caused me to react the way I did, but two co-workers noticed that I was calm after they did an "April Fools" type joke where they asked I minded having 11 patients by myself with an admission on the way. (The unit can have 2 nurses once it reaches 8 patients.) I had to ask myself, "I don't feel any different...Could I really be improving?)
This book was good enough that I'd like to read TerKeurst's other stuff (Made to Crave and Becoming More Than a Good Bible Study Girl). I know of Made to Crave from having read Mandisa's book Idoleyes, but I didn't know TerKeurst was the author when I chose Unglued.
This one gets less helpful (that is, more repetitive) the further you read. But by that point hopefully you'll have what you need.
I might add that on christianbook.com, where I submit my reviews, all 39 reviewers would recommend this one to their friends. Make it 40.
I received this book for free from the publisher through the BookSneezeÂ®.com (http://BookSneezeÂ®.com> book review bloggers program.
The author has a wonderful way of sharing her life with the reader while illustrating her teaching. She's down to earth, practical yet biblically based in her insights. A quick read and a good one for those who need a little clarification about what to do in messy emotional situations.
"Unglued", by Lysa TerKeurst is a great book on how to deal with natural emotions that sometimes lead us to disobey God. It helps us to realize we can choose our thoughts, and even though we can't always control our emotions, we can control our actions. We should always live to please and obey God.